Anger and Depression

I've been depressed for the last few days, and it has nothing to do with our finances. My husband was able to make a lot of money working as a contractor for a few weeks, and now he's back on unemployment insurance.

He has sent five resumes and has had four interviews. The last one, today, was at the place where he worked as a contractor.

His success should make me happy, but it doesn't. Because I have sent upwards of 40 resumes, had one interview, and no job.

I'm depressed for several reasons. One is the realization that in order to work again, I'm going to have to update my IT skills and look for work in IT where, apparently, I belong. I never sent more than 20 resumes to get a job in IT. But it seems like I will have to send 1000 to get a $10/hour job.

I'm also depressed because the agency that's supposed to be helping me recently changed the placement worker, and the knew one is a clueless newly graduate that lives in her own little world. I don't want to elaborate, but she is making me very angry.

She calls all excited about some job she saw advertised and tries to convince me to apply as if were a sure thing that I'll get the effing job, conveniently forgetting that I will have to compete with the other 400 applicants. She doesn't have to convince me that the jobs are good. She has to help me get one.

So, yeah, I have been feeling down for a couple of days. Which is probably partially hormonal and partially normal for a job seeker. I started feeling better today. I had knew ideas as to how to go about my job search and decided to start again. Leave it to the placement worker to make me angry all over again with a stupid phone call.

It is so good to admit that I am angry. I feel the pressure released from my belly. I will exercise, then have lunch, and then see if I can go play with my nephew.