OK, They Like Him

My husband's contract that was supposed to end in April has been extended for the third time, for six more months.

The deal is that his position was taken over by another department at the university, and that department posted the position, at a much lower salary, and my husband applied for it.

After a three-month process, he's been told that he is on probation with the new department for six months--keeping his salary. At that time, the job will be posted again, and if they like his performance so far, he will be given a permanent job at the university.

As I told my husband, I think they want to pay him more, and when the job gets re-posted, the salary will be higher. They can't just pay him more right now on a permanent position, because there is a union involved, and they have to be careful to follow procedure.

At any rate, the whole enchilada has affected me at several levels. When he first told me in March that he only had one month of contract left, I thought I was going to die.

Then I considered the possibility of going back to the workforce and have been thinking/planning for it since. I've been doing all this, basically, with a gun over my head: I work or else.

I know now that my husband will probably work at the university for the rest of his career. It's a great place to work (five weeks of holidays a year, one of them being around Christmas). Benefits are great and the work environment is excellent. This is the first time in his career that he doesn't have to carry a pager and constantly get up in the middle of the night to fix problems.

But I just went through a Career Exploration course with a cloud over my head--will he be employed in October or not?

I don't believe I was thinking clearly. Now I probably am. It almost feels like I need to go through the course again, taking the new knowledge into account.

In other words, without the pressure of having to work, I don't know what to do. I need to redefine my needs and desires now that I am not under duress.

It occurs to me that I should get a volunteer position on each of my areas of interest, just to see how much I like doing the jobs. Perhaps I should contact organizations with the volunteer idea in mind.

Wow! Writing this has been helpful. If anybody reads it, thank you for your patience. This is one of those rare occasions when I just write without an outline. This is journaling at its best.